At the risk of sounding like a total fucking square, I want to talk about the pot article in the New York Times this weekend. No, not the one where they make a well researched and reasoned argument for the legalization of marijuana. The one where a bunch people consult professionals over what strain of weed to serve at their weddings. While visiting my parents this weekend, I woke up early and found myself reading this article on the porch, trying to stifle my laughs, make sense of the world, and wondering whether I was finally out of touch.
The gist is that, in states where pot has become legal, people are finding ways to incorporate it into their weddings. The ideas range from reasonable (have a box of joints available near the bar for everyone’s use) to slightly ridiculous (naming your tables after different strains, like Grape Ape and Skunk 1–potheads should never name things). And given that we’ve written about both pot and weddings before, this seems to be right up our alley. So let’s discuss.
As much as I wanted to dismiss this whole thing, if you use the logic of “pot is no worse than alcohol,” a lot of this makes a lot of sense. If it’s legal, and thus gaining social acceptability, why not have a few joints or e-cigarettes available with cocktails? If people are getting their friends to brew them craft beer for their receptions, why not have a friend who grows make you a special strain? “We’ve got to get to the point where smoking is classier than drinking,” said one “budtender” (UGH) in the article, and it’s true that lighting up isn’t quite as sexy as sipping a martini, but it’s not hard to see how it would get there.
However, where I personally draw the line is turning pot from an available item into a “theme.” I feel this way about alcohol “themed” weddings as well. It’s one thing to have an open bar, but quite another to insist that drinking be part of everyone’s experience, and it’s no different with pot. Having pot brownies instead of a cake, or giving away pot plants as favors, suggests that this is more of a mandatory activity.
As with alcohol and liquor licenses, there are also logistics to consider. Unless you’re in a very well ventilated place, you’re encouraging a lot of secondhand smoke (and secondhand highs), and even if you’re outdoors it’s hard not to smell pot. You risk guests going back to states, and jobs, where marijuana isn’t legal, and possibly getting busted on a drug test.
In our recent theme of sobriety, also remember that, like any other drug, pot isn’t for everyone. The article quoted a lot of people saying how relaxed pot makes everyone, how loving and emotional and kind. And that’s true for many people! But it can make others paranoid and quiet and antisocial. Weddings are parties, and your goal at any party is making sure your guests feel comfortable and provided for (without driving yourself crazy or having it turn into something you don’t want). If, for your group of people, that means pot at every table then go for it. Just make sure you’re not going to alienate anyone by making it the focal point of your day.
Also don’t ever catch yourself saying sentences like “The Space Cheese itself lent a giggly buzz to everyone while we rehashed the day’s events.” Potheads! Get better at naming things!
What’s your problem with the names? Most of them are fairly logical. A budtender is one who tends buds rather than a bar. Grape Ape smells and tastes like grape. I grant the less classy names like Cat Piss raise my eyebrow, but I don’t see a problem with naming a skunky smelling plant Skunk. As to the question it depends on who’s invited and how big a party it is I would think. If it’s a smallish thing and the organizers know for a fact that all invitees partake, a themed party could be fun. And as far as the effects on different people, offering a range of strain selections and methods of ingestion would help a lot with that. In a group where most but not all use pot, non-weed alternatives could be offered as well. Perhaps have a weed cake and a normal cake, a bud bar and a normal drinks(alcoholic and/or otherwise). Otherwise it’d be best kept low key – but then again I have a hard time imagining anyone planning this kind of wedding knowing it was going to be or cause problems for anyone attending. As much of a cannabis fan as I am, if I knew people from non-mj-friendly situations would be attending my wedding, I wouldn’t make pot a major thing in the wedding. No more than I’d bring my dog to the event if dog allergy or phobia sufferers were going to be there. Just my thought I guess.